Dear Baby,
I know you're in there already, I just woke up with this overwhelming feeling. This is going to sound so weird but I dreamt about you last night. Maybe I am just crazy. Last night was pretty awful, I don't even know how to describe what happened fully, but something did. I know I didn't drink enough to forget like I am. It's weird I feel like I see the night in flashes.
We were at the bar drinking and watching the Sixers game and then all of a sudden I wasn't feeling great. I decided to put my things in the hotel room. I was just going to go to sleep for awhile, next thing I new I woke up with fog like memories. I even missed work, which I never do. I remember asking him to get off of me, I remember realizing that he wasn't going to listen to me and I had no control over my body at all. I begged him not to cum inside me, he asked me what I said and I repeated please don't cum in me and he continued to hold my legs open while he thrust inside of me. I couldn't do anything and he literally laughed at my requests. I remember tears rolling down my cheek, I didn't have any strength to push him off, I really tried but my body felt so weird. At one point I think I just passed out because I don't remember putting my clothes back on or anything.
My super power is that he doesn't know that I remember. I will keep that to myself for now. I likely sound like a crazy person and honestly some part of me even believes that to be true. Crazy or not, I promise do everything in my power to keep you safe and be the best mother I can be to you no matter what happens. Even if I am only your mother while you grow into a baby, I promise I will get this right.
You will be okay no matter what.
I love you simply for existing,
Mom
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